Charade
by f U n N i E b O n E s 2K
Summary: QWxDC // Dorothy visits Quatre late at night... The lonely game of charade she played with him caused them to be two ill-fated, poor souls…“I love you too much to let you drag your name in the mud by marrying me…Yet … I love you too much to let yo


A/N: I looooved Lord of the Rings! Such an awesome movie! I found the ending quite surprising, not what I expected…I wanna see it again, and again, and again, and again!

Whahaha snow day! I'm happy! I get to sleep and be lazy if I want to!

Warnings:

- QWxDC pairing, "Don't like, then don't read!"

- Pretty angsty stuff ahead! If you like angst, and don't like the ending of the story, email me, because I was thinking of an alternate, more depressing ending for this…

- I know it's a poor attempt at a QWxDC, really craptastic, but there's not much of these babies to go around…and besides, I wondered what it would be like if I put them in this HeeroxRelena late-night-bedroom scene…

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Charade

"A week from today was the big day, yes indeed it will be. Amelia Philips is a certainly refined woman. We'll have such lovely children, and she will be the perfect wife. Actually, she's too perfect. She has everything, brains, beauty and breeding…" He mused to himself, as he felt his eyes suddenly water.

_'But you do not love her.' A raspy voice at the back of his head whispered to him, and it sent a shiver down his spine._

It's been a year since they exchanged glances, swapped a few _courteous words, a year since he hopelessly tried to make her fall for him…_

All failed as usual…

He recently was seeing a distinguished woman who he thought would take his mind off of Dorothy. Amelia was the complete opposite of her, and she was absolutely wonderful. A part of him wanted to kick himself for giving the ring he meant for Dorothy to someone else. Someone else he had no feelings for.

_'True, you might have everything, and love may come later, but will you truly be happy?'_

But instead of putting Dorothy behind, and considering her the past, he found himself comparing Dorothy to what Amelia was not. And never will be.

Amelia was too easy to get, she was too sweet, too polite…

And she definitely had a soft heart that knew how to cry…

_'Will you truly be happy?'_

"The woman I love does not care for me! She loathes the very sight of me, how can something be possible for us? If I can't have her, then I should have someone who is at least willing to try!" He said, defending his choice.

He stretched to close his lamp, and pull up the covers on his shivering body.

_'You were well aware that she was no easy card to play… you told yourself you wouldn't give up, you couldn't give up… you can't!'_

"Shut up! Shut up!" He cried almost desperately, knowing that his futile attempts have failed, and there was no way Dorothy could love him the way he did. He just hoped his way of lessening his desperation for her would not make him seem more desperate.

Half of his mind wished, almost anxiously that Dorothy would some how crash his engagement, and tell him how terribly she was in love with him. He knew that just seeing her once would change his mind, even if she didn't say or do anything. He was not only smitten by her incredibly, but he was genuinely in love with her. He only wished she felt the same way, and she would openly admit it to him, and most especially, to herself. 

He let sleep overcome him, and dismissed the very thought of Dorothy ever spoiling his engagement. She would never stoop down to that level. But even though he rejected his high desires and expectations, he couldn't get his mind off of her.

_'How can you be so blind, Dorothy?__ My love would have been enough to keep us both happy…'  He thought sadly, trying to keep himself from crying to sleep._

Part of him knew it was too late to hope for anything.  

Or so he thought.

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"Oh God, what am I doing here?" She asked herself softly, feeling extremely stupid and silly that she was about to break her way into Quatre's house. She felt even more foolish when she thought of her real purpose – she was going to ruin Quatre's engagement with that Philips girl.  She realized that she was already standing on his balcony, and she was contemplating whether she should do it or not.

_'If only you didn't push him away…then you wouldn't be in this present situation…'_

_'Heero, if it worked for you, then it better for me, or… or …' She cringed at the idea of having to slice and dice Relena's husband later. She never thought she would ask advice from Heero Yuy, but when things just got too hopeless she had no other option…_

She opened the French doors to his room gently, surprised he left it unlocked. She was glad she went to one of his invitations before, and he took her around his house. It would have been awkward trying to tell his room apart from ten gazillion other ones. It would have been trying to find a needle in a haystack!

She wandered in the dark, finding it difficult to locate his bed from all the other things he had in his room.

_'How can he be so neat? I expected it to be a cluttered mess in here!'_

She found herself before his corporate desk, the desk where he makes most of his personal decisions. He occasionally mentioned it to her that he liked working by himself, at home where he's not pressured or strained. A video-phone sat deftly on the right hand corner, and a stationery set was positioned on the opposite side. On the center there was a calendar, on which had scribbled notes on almost every date. The papers were neatly stacked into small folders, and many pictures of his sisters were tidily positioned in front of his desk.

She placed her hand on the handle of the right drawer in it was an upside down picture frame. She took it, and turned it around to realize that the girl in the picture was her. She suddenly felt a tightening in her chest.

_'I don't blame him for doing that…I've caused him all of the misery in the world…'_

She set the picture delicately back on the drawer, and closed it, trying not to make a sound.

_'Maybe I should just leave I'm doing him a favor that way… I don't deserve him…' Her eyes wandered across the room, but she wasn't thinking of what she saw, but she felt regret for hurting and upsetting him._

When she came back to her present situation, she found her eyes on Quatre's bed, which was a few feet away from where she was standing.

Her heart nearly skipped a few beats as she began to pace towards him slowly…

Noticing the way he looked so innocent while he was sleeping made her feel somewhat embarrassed…

Imagining him in striped pajamas caused a faint warm feeling in her cheeks…

_'How can someone so childlike fall in love with such a mischievous sprite like I am?' She considered, thinking that their relationship seemed too impossible that it actually could work…_

_'It was always the devil who corrupted the angel…'_

She suddenly wondered what it would be like to sleep in his bed, carry his name, bear his children and take care of him for the rest of his days. Nothing sounded more gratifying.

She sat by his side, not making any noise, and held his hand, placing it on her cheek.

"I love you too much to let you drag your soul, your name, and your heart in the mud by marrying me…please understand…" Her voice was merely a whisper as she murmured them softly to him.

She almost thought he stirred a little. Almost.

The way she felt for him when she saw him was too overwhelming, too devastating…

She sobbed and sniffled a bit, taking deep breaths…

The only solution to this distressing experience was to hide from him, and she did.

The charade she thought she played with him, played on her.

Realization once hit her again.

"Yet … I love you too much to let you go…" She felt her eyes dampen suddenly, and a small, delicate bead of a tear trickled down her face and moistened his hand…the next few beads slid down hurriedly like prisoners escaping, and the drops shined against the faint moonlight…

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He was woken up by the feel of her, the sound of her, he knew her too well, was drawn to her so greatly, that the very small hint of her shook his heart from its core.

… As if he was bonded with her…

He heard her saying words he never imagined she would dare speak, and he kept his eyes closed partly wishing it was a dream, but most of him hoped it wasn't so…

"I love you too much to let you drag your name in the mud by marrying me…please understand…"

He could hear a few subtle sobs from her, and heard her sniffle softly…

"Yet … I love you too much to let you go…"

Her hot tears nearly burned his skin as they came in contact with his hand.

She let go of his hand abruptly, and took a few swift steps back.

He couldn't take it anymore, he had his chance…

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As she let his hand go unexpectedly, she believed she finally let it all go…

She turned away, forcing herself never to look back and give him the future he deserves. He has suffered because of his love for her too much already, and she knew she would hate herself more for doing so. The lonely game of charade she played with him caused them to be two ill-fated, poor souls and the only way to mend it depends on the ones who play it…

"Now it's all said and done, I must let you go when I have strength to do so…" She whispered audibly, praying he would hear her.

_'Don't make me change my mind Quatre, because this time I really will…'_

She closed her eyes to conceal the distressing vision in front of her, as she placed her hand fervently on the cold knob…

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He turned her around abruptly, and he thought he grabbed her almost too roughly and faced her, his warm blue eyes changing into blue fierce ones she has never seen before.

"Dorothy, I told myself that if ever our paths would cross once again, I would leave my life behind to spend a moment with you and try one last time even though I knew nothing was going to happen…" He said softly, caressing her hair, tucking it soothingly behind her ear. His eyes softened a bit, and her eyes looked back at him with shock.

"You don't know how I wanted this so badly… if you love me, you'd stay here with me, and not think that you're doing me a favor by giving me this future my heart doesn't desire at all…"

"Quatre—I—" He placed a finger to her lips placidly, his eyes asking her to let him say the words he longed to say to her.

"What my heart desires…"

She cut him off by kissing him vehemently, and bruising both of their lips, pouring out the many words that were too much to say, too unimaginable for words…

"…Is you" He finished, as he pulled out rapidly.

"You looked as if you wanted to be alone in this charade of yours, but I couldn't let you hurt yourself exceedingly like that…If you wanted to be alone, the least I wanted was to be alone with you…" He wiped the tears that were descending down her cheek with his thumb affectionately.

She wrapped her arms around his waist restlessly, and resting her head on his chest as if holding on for her dear life. She began to cry willingly, dampening his shirt.

"I'm so sorry—I ruined it all—we would have been so happy if only I wasn't too egotistical—if only I wasn't so irrational to think I didn't need you…and I did, terribly…"

"Ssssh. It's going to be alright, I know it will…I will be here…" He kissed her tenderly that guaranteed his love, and along with that, a night full of promises that she knew in her heart would be fulfilled.

Somehow she knew it was going to be alright, and it seemed his arms were the only true living refuge that existed.

She was finally home now, where she belonged, and the place she sought after but failed to recognize.

Their silly little game of charade has ended – when she played it, only one could tell her arrogance was only a mask of her sadness and insecurity in the world, and she found no reason to play it anymore.

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**"When we played our charade,**

**We were like children posing…**

**Playing at games,**

**Acting out names,**

**Guessing the parts we played.**

**….Fate seemed to pull the strings…**

**I turned and you were gone…**

**While from the darkened wings,**

**The music box played on…**

**Sad little serenade,**

**Song of my heart's composing…**

**I hear it still,**

**I always will,**

**Best on the bill…**

**Charade…"**

**- Johnny Merler & Henry Mancini**

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Have any comments, suggestions, or death threats?

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Email them to me!

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**Craziereggie392@aol.com**


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